I was temporarily speechless when I heard the presenter announce my name as the award winner at an annual awards show that honors small business excellence.
I had won the category of "The Best Motivational Speaker in 5 Minutes or Less" and I was at a loss for words because the other three contestants were all outstanding.
Plus, I remembered losing in 2007, when I was certain I'd presented a winning speech.
Although the loss was a disappointment, I decided it would not be a setback to my goal.
What do you do when you don't win a competition, don't get the job you interviewed for, or the promotion you think you deserve? Should we give up? When confronted with a losing situation, be it work-related or personal, we should ask ourselves, "Is what's preventing me from reaching my goal a temporary obstacle or a permanent one?" When we face any kind of disappointment, our answer to that question can make all the difference in the world.
If you decide that the setback is temporary, here are Seven Essential Steps for Overcoming Obstacles.
1.
Stay positive - Do not slip into negative self talk by thinking "it will never happen for me" or "I'm not smart enough" or similar thoughts.
Replace them with more positive ones like" "I've got what it takes or "I will try harder and be better prepared next time" etc.
We must embrace constructive thinking that can propel us to take further action.
2.
"What could I have done differently?" This is a key question to ask yourself, because there is always something we could change.
By honestly looking for ways we could improve, we are on our way to achieving a more successful outcome the next time.
3.
Take action - After you have determined the changes you want to make - TAKE ACTION to make that happen the next time you try for your goal.
Do you need to take classes, get coaching, study or practice more? When I lost the speech contest in 2007, I realized I needed a stronger, more compelling closing, one that the judges would remember.
So, I wrote and practiced a new speech with that in mind.
4.
Get Positive Support - We must associate with encouraging, supportive people.
Avoid the naysayers with their dim outlook on your prospects.
Disassociate with anyone who is negative.
If you cannot avoid them completely, at least limit what you tell them.
5.
Rely on Your Beliefs - Use prayer, faith, spirituality, meditation and/or visualization.
Whatever your practices, fully engage in them.
During these challenging times, your beliefs can make all the difference in creating a better outcome, so do not forget them.
6.
Try, try again! - Go on another job interview, apply for another promotion, make more calls to potential clients, etc.
Whatever your goal is, go for it - this time with more knowledge, better preparation, and greater skills.
7.
Celebrate - If you succeed on your next attempt, then celebrate ...
you deserve it! But if you do not, ask yourself, "Do I still want to achieve this goal?" If the answer is "yes", then see step #1 and start anew.
If you are hesitant about trying again, keep in mind that most people do not succeed right away.
Consider the authors Jack Canfield and Mark V.
Hansen, who received 140 rejections from publishing companies before finding one that would publish the first edition of their famous Chicken Soup for the Soul® series.
Do you have that kind of persistence? If you do, then definitely try again.
If you do not have the determination required to continue with your original goal, then replace it with a new one.
Benjamin E.
Mays said, "The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal.
The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.
" So find a new goal that you can be passionate about and pursue it with all the persistence and enthusiasm you have!