Temporarily

• 1). Grab the cow by its horns. Cradle its head in you arm.
  
  
• 2). Rub its cheeks with your fingertips. Notice its eyes getting heavy.
  
  
• 3). Lay the cow's head down. The animal will sleep while standing up.
  
  

Permanently

• 1). Hold the barrel of a gun between two and 10 inches from the front of the cow's skull. Aim it perpendicular to the skull to avoid a ricochet.
  
  
• 2). Draw an imaginary "X" from the eyes to the horns. Aim the gun at the intersection of the "X." If the cow doesn't have horns, draw the imaginary "X" to just above the ears.
  
  
• 3). Use a .22 caliber long bullet and rifle or pistol for young animals. For older cows, use a .22 magnum, 9 mm round or a .357 magnum.