It's easy to get locked into the habit of doing too much for your children.
You love them dearly, would do anything for them when it comes right down to it.
Of course when they were babies you didn't mind doing everything for them.
After all, they couldn't do anything for themselves, so you had no choice.
Ten years later, however, after picking up your daughter's shoes (left in the living room for the 27th time), you've probably lost that warm bubbly feeling inside.
Instead, you find yourself fuming, feeling like you've been taken advantage of.
Well, don't worry, it is possible to get your kids to be more responsible: 1) Start 'em off young.
Why wave off your 2 year old when she comes over to help you fold the laundry? Give her a pair of folded pants, show her where they go in her drawer, and let her put them away.
You don't have to do everything, and she loves doing it.
Let her.
2) Make it fun.
Cleaning is easier when you sing along, put on your favorite music, or crack your best jokes.
Chore time doesn't have to be a chore, unless you make it one.
Find ways you can make the time go faster by doing some of your favorite things while cleaning up.
3) Do it together.
It's a lot easier to get a job done when you all work together.
Obvious but true.
If you get down and help your children clean up the living together, you'll have quality time and a clean living room.
4) Build in family time as a reward.
As a kid Sundays were the day we cleaned the house.
My brother and I cleaned the whole 3 bedroom house together- toilets included.
Somehow I don't remember it as being drudgery work, and one of the reasons is because we knew that when we finished, we could go on a fun family trip: to the zoo, park, or a museum.
5) Show your children how much you appreciate their help.
Why is that if a stranger does the teeniest little thing for us, we fall all over ourselves to thank them, but if our daughter makes a surprise and cleans the whole house we give her only a lukewarm thanks? Your children deserve and need to hear how much you appreciate their help.
Don't just thank them.
Send a note, with a cute drawing or a small treat.
Call grandma and tell her (with your children in earshot) how much they helped you.
Boast to your neighbors.
Everyone wants to feel appreciated, children included.
6) Explain to them why their help is needed.
Sometimes we take if for granted that our children understand why we need their help.
But just because it's obvious to you it may not be obvious to them.
If you need quiet while on the phone for work, explain to them: "This is for my job.
If you want to have money so you can eat and do all the fun things we do, then I need you to be quiet on the phone.
" You'll be surprised how quickly they learn to wait to speak to you until you get off of the phone.
7) Mean what you say.
How often have you promised your children to go out to the park after you finish this one thing-only to start on another job because they were playing so nicely? That's not fair, and your children will learn to not trust what you say.
If you want to do another job, ask them first if they mind.
It's just common courtesy.