Do You Want To Make Friends In College Or University? - Part One
The general idea of making friends and becoming more social is entertaining and easy for some very few individuals while it is uneasy and more stressing for many others. However; for both kinds of people; making friends is very possible and is generally good for your well-being in all aspects including psychologically and emotionally. Although in some cases friends may turn into hurting sticks behind our backs but in most cases they play a great role in our lives.
As students; we need friends in our daily activities including academic and non-academics activities. In college and universities; friends are the biggest part of our social lives; they simply magically make our days smooth, entertaining and more fulfilling. Despite the important need of friends in our college or university life; we sometimes face a lot of difficulties making friends due to factors like our social backgrounds, believes, expectations etc.
Whatever the factors that keeps us from making friends in college or universities; the one and only one truth that friends make our college or university life easier and better to live; will still remain to be true. Therefore it is very important to consider the factors that hind you from making good quality friends in college or university as challenges that need to be faced and conquered and finally succeed.
In most cases; college or university life is designed in such a way to make both academic and non-academics activities fun and entertaining; the ability to utilize this designs to the fullest is by having best matched friends.
However; you should also put into consideration that making friends is not only about the number of friends you will have; but also the quality of friends you will have. That is why it important to have the best knowledge on how to make this happen not only by chance but also by your very own conscious actions.
Together; conscious and unconscious actions towards making friends in college or university will most likely build the best quality team of friends that you will enjoy and be glad with throughout your college or university period.
Making Friends in College or University - Part One
Determine Your Characters
No bird is the same as the other; the same is with human beings. You are simply unique in almost everything you do. It's your characters that make you as unique as you are; unless you notice them; you'll never know who truly you are. Take time to understand yourself; what you like, what you don't like, what is your hobby, how is your attitude, what habits you have, what you can tolerate, what you can't tolerate, what characters you enjoy interacting with, what characters you don't enjoy interacting with and so forth.
Now that you are in college; you are old enough to know and understand how good and weak you are at certain things. You don't have to feel guilty or inferior about your weakness; everyone has their weaknesses anyway but very few strong people acknowledge their weaknesses and embrace them so as to fit in their preferable environment. Embracing a weakness is in real sense treating or curing it; so don't let your ego fool you the opposite.
Write down all the characters that you notice about yourself; this will be a guide on what environment of friends you are likely to fit in the most and gain the most from it.
Determine Your Friend's Characters
After you have determined your own characters; that includes all the good and bad characters; now it's time to determine your future friend's characters. You have to determine what kind of friends you'd really like to have. Just to make it clear: don't expect miracles here; the type of friends you determine to have should go in hand with the characters you have. If a character doesn't match; you then have two options.
Option one is to forget about getting that miraculous type of friend that doesn't match your characters and option two is to change your character so that it suits the type of friend you'd want to have; no shortcuts there; you only harvest what you plant. Also you should bear in mind that a good friend starts with you and not them.
If you want a sincere and trustful friend then you should either be sincere and trustful yourself or learn how to be sincere and trustful and when your character has developed and so will the type of friends to be attracted to you. Keep on matching your characters to the friend you'd like to have and you will surely end up with the type of friends you are more likely to fit in and collaborate more easily and better.
Be a Friend to Others
Just like the way you'd like to have good friends that fill your day with joy, happiness, positive achievements and success; that is the very same thing that others would like and appreciate from you as their friend. Give your friends what you'd like them to give you. The good thing about friendship is that it is two-way traffic; it is all about you and him/her/them.
As long as you like great things done to you by others; rest assured that others would like great things done to them by you. Doing great things to others will attract them to come even closer to you and thus forming friendship. Be aware of friends who are always there to only receive from you rather than to share or to give.
Good friends always find things to share with you and give you. Since you are a good friend and they are your good friends; you'll always be sharing stuffs, giving them stuffs and them giving you stuffs; apart from that; you should look thoroughly if the friendship you are having is worth it; unless you have other interests from the friendship that is worth you just giving out rather than sharing or taking.
Have a Goal and Hobby
If you really want to achieve something in life; first think of how you are going to achieve it and then second go ahead and achieve it; don't waste every single day thinking of how you can achieve it; you'll just waste your precious time and you are most likely to not achieve it either. As you are in the process of making friends; get busy with your true personal life.
Have a goal. By having a goal; i mean choose your career and focus on making it happen. Since you are in college or university; you probably have already chosen your career that you are most likely to spend your lifetime on. Work on that; do what you have to do to make it happen; not just to happen but to make it happen big time.
A career in most times; it's were you get really busy, focused and set your earning potential. A hobby is what you really like, enjoy and have fun doing. It could be watching football, gaming, dancing, singing, swimming etc. Whatever it is; get into it. Nobody likes to have friends with no life goals and hobbies; and even if there are; be aware that they might not be uplifting you or most likely they might have no any clear goals and hobbies themselves.
That doesn't seem so good in a friendship; there has to be something really strong that binds people to be in a real friendship; something that worth's their lives. Join respective clubs or groups that deal with your career and hobby; and in there is where you will most likely meet your real friends and even bigger relationships.
Engaging in your life career and hobby is a great way to use your life effectively and it attracts similar minded people closer to you which results to great friends. Just be aware at all times of the possibilities of meeting new people interested in making friendship with you; and when they occur; keep smiling and give positive feedback as you keep on doing what you do.
Don't Be So Picky
Yes! It's very obvious that you are not interested with just anybody who wants to be friends with you; but also you should know that unless you really know someone you do not have the right reasons to disagree with their requests. It's very true that some people just by the look of the eye; you can tell that he/she is good or bad; but that is not always true.
Some people look good from their exterior but very uninviting in their interior but unless you are close to them you'll never know. Be easy and don't take things very personal. Everyone has full control over his/her life and so is you; at any time when you notice that your friendship with someone is not worth it; you can cut it off and stay safe in the very early stages; but unless you notice that don't be so picky by just observing the physical looks of people; you might pass over very good friends unknowingly.
If a fellow student is trying to get close to you; don't step back; be still and keep watching where they are trying to take your relationship to. But after a long run of doing so and you still feel awkward about it; don't hesitate cutting it off; it's for the best; but just don't do it too early.
(Continue Reading Part Two)
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As students; we need friends in our daily activities including academic and non-academics activities. In college and universities; friends are the biggest part of our social lives; they simply magically make our days smooth, entertaining and more fulfilling. Despite the important need of friends in our college or university life; we sometimes face a lot of difficulties making friends due to factors like our social backgrounds, believes, expectations etc.
Whatever the factors that keeps us from making friends in college or universities; the one and only one truth that friends make our college or university life easier and better to live; will still remain to be true. Therefore it is very important to consider the factors that hind you from making good quality friends in college or university as challenges that need to be faced and conquered and finally succeed.
In most cases; college or university life is designed in such a way to make both academic and non-academics activities fun and entertaining; the ability to utilize this designs to the fullest is by having best matched friends.
However; you should also put into consideration that making friends is not only about the number of friends you will have; but also the quality of friends you will have. That is why it important to have the best knowledge on how to make this happen not only by chance but also by your very own conscious actions.
Together; conscious and unconscious actions towards making friends in college or university will most likely build the best quality team of friends that you will enjoy and be glad with throughout your college or university period.
Making Friends in College or University - Part One
Determine Your Characters
No bird is the same as the other; the same is with human beings. You are simply unique in almost everything you do. It's your characters that make you as unique as you are; unless you notice them; you'll never know who truly you are. Take time to understand yourself; what you like, what you don't like, what is your hobby, how is your attitude, what habits you have, what you can tolerate, what you can't tolerate, what characters you enjoy interacting with, what characters you don't enjoy interacting with and so forth.
Now that you are in college; you are old enough to know and understand how good and weak you are at certain things. You don't have to feel guilty or inferior about your weakness; everyone has their weaknesses anyway but very few strong people acknowledge their weaknesses and embrace them so as to fit in their preferable environment. Embracing a weakness is in real sense treating or curing it; so don't let your ego fool you the opposite.
Write down all the characters that you notice about yourself; this will be a guide on what environment of friends you are likely to fit in the most and gain the most from it.
Determine Your Friend's Characters
After you have determined your own characters; that includes all the good and bad characters; now it's time to determine your future friend's characters. You have to determine what kind of friends you'd really like to have. Just to make it clear: don't expect miracles here; the type of friends you determine to have should go in hand with the characters you have. If a character doesn't match; you then have two options.
Option one is to forget about getting that miraculous type of friend that doesn't match your characters and option two is to change your character so that it suits the type of friend you'd want to have; no shortcuts there; you only harvest what you plant. Also you should bear in mind that a good friend starts with you and not them.
If you want a sincere and trustful friend then you should either be sincere and trustful yourself or learn how to be sincere and trustful and when your character has developed and so will the type of friends to be attracted to you. Keep on matching your characters to the friend you'd like to have and you will surely end up with the type of friends you are more likely to fit in and collaborate more easily and better.
Be a Friend to Others
Just like the way you'd like to have good friends that fill your day with joy, happiness, positive achievements and success; that is the very same thing that others would like and appreciate from you as their friend. Give your friends what you'd like them to give you. The good thing about friendship is that it is two-way traffic; it is all about you and him/her/them.
As long as you like great things done to you by others; rest assured that others would like great things done to them by you. Doing great things to others will attract them to come even closer to you and thus forming friendship. Be aware of friends who are always there to only receive from you rather than to share or to give.
Good friends always find things to share with you and give you. Since you are a good friend and they are your good friends; you'll always be sharing stuffs, giving them stuffs and them giving you stuffs; apart from that; you should look thoroughly if the friendship you are having is worth it; unless you have other interests from the friendship that is worth you just giving out rather than sharing or taking.
Have a Goal and Hobby
If you really want to achieve something in life; first think of how you are going to achieve it and then second go ahead and achieve it; don't waste every single day thinking of how you can achieve it; you'll just waste your precious time and you are most likely to not achieve it either. As you are in the process of making friends; get busy with your true personal life.
Have a goal. By having a goal; i mean choose your career and focus on making it happen. Since you are in college or university; you probably have already chosen your career that you are most likely to spend your lifetime on. Work on that; do what you have to do to make it happen; not just to happen but to make it happen big time.
A career in most times; it's were you get really busy, focused and set your earning potential. A hobby is what you really like, enjoy and have fun doing. It could be watching football, gaming, dancing, singing, swimming etc. Whatever it is; get into it. Nobody likes to have friends with no life goals and hobbies; and even if there are; be aware that they might not be uplifting you or most likely they might have no any clear goals and hobbies themselves.
That doesn't seem so good in a friendship; there has to be something really strong that binds people to be in a real friendship; something that worth's their lives. Join respective clubs or groups that deal with your career and hobby; and in there is where you will most likely meet your real friends and even bigger relationships.
Engaging in your life career and hobby is a great way to use your life effectively and it attracts similar minded people closer to you which results to great friends. Just be aware at all times of the possibilities of meeting new people interested in making friendship with you; and when they occur; keep smiling and give positive feedback as you keep on doing what you do.
Don't Be So Picky
Yes! It's very obvious that you are not interested with just anybody who wants to be friends with you; but also you should know that unless you really know someone you do not have the right reasons to disagree with their requests. It's very true that some people just by the look of the eye; you can tell that he/she is good or bad; but that is not always true.
Some people look good from their exterior but very uninviting in their interior but unless you are close to them you'll never know. Be easy and don't take things very personal. Everyone has full control over his/her life and so is you; at any time when you notice that your friendship with someone is not worth it; you can cut it off and stay safe in the very early stages; but unless you notice that don't be so picky by just observing the physical looks of people; you might pass over very good friends unknowingly.
If a fellow student is trying to get close to you; don't step back; be still and keep watching where they are trying to take your relationship to. But after a long run of doing so and you still feel awkward about it; don't hesitate cutting it off; it's for the best; but just don't do it too early.
(Continue Reading Part Two)
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