It's sad to hear so many people saying help me save my marriage, and I don't know what to do to fix it.
It hurts to see so much of this.
The problem is that there is so much crap information out there.
There's so much going on out there that doesn't work.
Another problem is that so many people want to tell you what you should do to save your marriage, but what they forget to tell you is what you SHOULDN'T do that will probably make the situation even worse.
When I was looking to save my marriage I made the same mistake.
I was looking for ways to fix it.
You know, stuff that I should do to fix the marriage that was causing me stress and keeping me up at night.
But at the same time I did a bunch of stuff that I shouldn't have done.
I see this a lot now, people may actually be going in the right direction doing some of the things that could help (usually they're severely misinformed here too though)...
but at the same time doing so many of the no no's that they're ultimately getting nowhere at tall.
It's like playing tug o' war.
If you're pulling two sides of a rope in opposite directions the middle of the rope basically stays right where it's at.
No way to get ahead, especially if you're asking help me save my marriage.
So What Are the Things That You Should Be Doing If You Need Help Saving a Marriage? First of all: Don't go talking to a lawyer just in case...
In many of my articles, and in my E-course I talk a lot about how you should just take divorce off the table all together.
So going to talk to a lawyer is a no no, unless of course you're being abused.
If that's the case then run like hell.
Second: Don't ask your family and friends for advice...
They don't know anything about marriage most likely, and even if they do they're already in a biased situation and therefore are going to give you terrible advice.
Third: Don't play the blame game...
It's tough I know, but the blame game really gets you nowhere.
You can't fix your spouse in any way, so blaming them for everything isn't going to get you anywhere.
Just start working on you, and the things about you that you can control.
Whenever some tells me "help me save my marriage", I tell them to stop trying to change their spouse immediately.
It never happens.
The faster you realize that you can't change someone else, even someone as close as your spouse, the better off you'll be...
Fourth: Get help that will allow you to fix the marriage even if you're doing it alone...
What often happens is that one spouse says I want to save my marriage, and the other one doesn't really care.
They're fed up and they just don't want to deal with it anymore.