"He who wishes to secure the good of others, has already secured his own". - Confucius

Next time you are in the grocery store, keep an eye open for an evolving phenomena. Pre-packaged and pre-prepared meals have now entered into the cheese market. I was down at the grocery store last week, doing some shopping on my way home from work. Looking down at all the different types of cheese in the deli before me, my attention was directed toward bags of grated cheese. I was astounded! Pre-grated cheese! And then it made me wonder...

If we are too lazy to even grate our own cheese, how bad have things become? Does this same paternalistic mentality over needing to buy cheese pre-grated follow into so many of our other facets of life? Can we buy houses that clean themselves, cars that drive themselves? It seems they are developing technology that will enable us to have vacuum cleaners that operate themselves as well as self-driven cars. Taking this one step further, how much do we expect others to do for us? How little do we expect to do for ourselves?

I mean, if we can't grate our own cheese, clean our own homes, drive ourselves about, then where do we take control of what is going on in our lives?

This mentality follows when it comes to your marriage. There is no product out there that is going to save your marriage for you. The act of buying a book is not going to magically turn your marriage problems around. Reading the book is not going to change your life either. Marriage involves work. Marriage problems require work and skill, and a commitment that the effort you make and the hardship you go through in the process of fixing your marriage will be well worth it. Reading about how to save a marriage is not going to magically change your life either. This thinking is going to throw your marriage under the bus. 

What is going to make a difference is having the determination to read the concepts and techniques that are offered and applying them to your marriage. This also means taking responsibility for saving your marriage. Ultimately any effort you put forth is going to determine your ability to bring your marriage back to survival.

Have you ever heard of a person learning to walk again succeed by reading a book about it? Would Christopher Columbus have discovered anything by reading a book about it without applying and setting his knowledge in motion? You get the point. Achieving success in any pursuit involves real work and real skills. It involves dedication, and personal dilligence to realize real results.

There are no shortcuts. The people who achieve great things in life, usually against great odds, are those who are determined to succeed and  take action and do something. Others can provide you with the tools, but the hard work and the achievement are ultimately your responsibility.

I cannot help those who will not help themselves. I provide the tools, and it is in your best interests to use and apply them. Next time you are at the supermarket, buy a block. Grate your own cheese. Clean your own floors, drive your own car. Save your own marriage. I will get you started and you can take it from there. Full On!