In the last few decades, public organizations and employers have made a concerted effort to promote tolerance and respect for Diversity among the races and ethnic groups comprising the social fabric of this country.
Discrimination on the basis of racial, ethnic origins, gender and religious beliefs has been outlawed.
The effort has largely been successful; race and ethnic riots are a thing of the past.
In our public life, we have learned to tolerate and even appreciate the differences between diverse segments of our society.
If I may say so, we have achieved an A grade in Diversity 101- Diversity in Public Life.
Perhaps it is now time to consider Diversity 102- Diversity in Private Life.
In this we have not received any formal training.
The only lessons we have received are through trial and error and the only school we have attended is the school of hard knocks.
This is in-spite of the fact that there are multiple forms of differences we have to deal with in our private lives.
These are not differences of race, but differences of perspective, priorities and understanding, and there is no schooling or training to prepare us for these.
Firstly, there is the difference between men and women.
Initially, the physical difference leads to attraction, as the French say "Viva La Difference" or long live the difference.
However, the difference in perspectives means that the attraction soon turns to distraction, as evidenced by the fact that over 50% of marriages end in divorce, in most cases very traumatic for both partners, not to mention their children.
When couples apply for a marriage license, why should they not be required to study and pass a marriage manual? After all, when we get a Driving License, we have to read a Manual and pass a test.
It is ironic that before most marriages, months of planning go into arranging various ceremonies like the engagement, the bridal shower and the wedding, each of which lasts just a few hours, whereas little attention is paid to preparing for the marriage relationship, which is (hopefully) for a lifetime.
Just imagine two companies implementing a merger and celebrating it with huge parties but without any planning for the restructuring of their finances, administration or manpower.
Their merger would be doomed to failure.
Yet that is how most marriages are implemented.
As a result, the success rate for weddings is 100%, while the success rate for marriages is not even 50%.
Secondly, there is a tremendous gulf between parents and children.
This is natural, but that does not mean that we should be unprepared for it.
A child's personality and perspective differs immensely from that of an adult's.
The difference is further increased by the generational changes in lifestyle that occur over 2 to 3 decades.
However, once again, there is no formal education or training that is imparted for managing this relationship.
In particular, there is tremendous conflict between teenagers and their parents, who often shake their heads or shrug philosophically and make wry remarks about their children passing through a "teenage" phase.
This conflict and turbulence is also accepted as a necessary evil, something that is natural and a part of life.
While that may be so, there is no reason why it cannot be mitigated by proper training and education.
We tend to believe that love and regard for those living closest to us, i.
e.
physical proximity, will automatically lead to emotional and mental closeness and harmonious relationships but reality does not bear this out.
(Maybe the reverse is true, as they say, familiarity breeds contempt).
In conclusion, it is high time that we educate and train ourselves for our personal relationships or institute Diversity 102-Diversity in Private Life, instead of leaving it up to nature.
Perhaps Diversity, like charity, begins at home.