Nothing is harder for a Financial Planner like me thanwhen I get the call that says "Rod, I need an appointment, (insert name of spouse) just walked out and I don't know what to do next".
Money and Fidelity.
The two biggest issues that are most likely to destroy a relationship today.
Both are saveable.
Career Development, Investment properties, a share portfolio, a growing retirement fund, an emergency cash fund.
When it comes to tackling the financial responsibilities of our family, we men are great.
In fact many of the blokes I know are so great at managing their careers and investment portfolios that they forget the most important investment of all, their wife and their marriage to her.
We just assume, that she knows we love her and that she appreciates all the crap we go through to make sure she and our progeny have a roof over their head and food in their bellies.
We live in a culture where more of us are being asked to work longer and longer hours.
Some of us even brag about the long hours we work, wearing our failing health and relationships like a badge of honour to flash around on the rare occasion we come up for air.
By the time, the weekend rolls around, many of the men I speak to have had enough.
They need mental space to clear their thoughts and download the events of the week.
So they hide behind their hobbies or household chores and draw ever further away from the woman they once described as the girl of their dreams.
So take a moment, are you guilty of putting your employers or business needs ahead of your woman.
Don't feel ashamed of that, many of us, including me, have done it.
The trick is to know you've crossed a line somewhere and to let her know you've recognised the fact.
Let her know that you recognise some things have to change, she will understand and will also appreciate that change will take some time.
She will recognise that you can't just stop doing 70 hour weeks without there being consequences.
She will give you the time to adjust your work responsibilities and time schedule.
So long as you tell her about it.
Otherwise it just looks like you're continuing to avoid spending time with her and the kids by hiding at the office.
Start dating your wife, set a regular date night where she is the focus of your attention.
Go to one of those relationship seminars she's been nagging you about and absolutely do, remind her and yourself regularly how lucky you are to have her.
Expect a dramatic improvement in bedroom activity.
Our girls love it when we prioritise them in our lives.
You don't have to do those things of course.
Just don't be surprised when all those assets you've been building end up in another man's filing cabinet.