If you are recently divorced, you might do yourself a big favor if you don't let yourself do some of the following: 1.
Don't go on a spending spree.
Many times, newly divorced people seek comfort in material things.
It may be tempting to treat yourself to a new car, house or wardrobe.
You may be hoping that your ex will see how well you can do without her, or just be trying hard to give yourself something to think about besides the pain you're feeling right now.
No matter what pleasure you think you'll get from expensive things, you will also get the bills, and new things don't stay new long enough for you to count on them for sustained good feelings.
Before you know it, you could be saying "I'd love to do that, but I spent all of my money when I was trying to get over my divorce.
" You will better be able to evaluate opportunities when you feel better all around.
2.
Don't commit yourself to another relationship.
Meeting people and even dating are fine.
However, the choices you make now are not as likely to be based on your long term needs.
The last thing you need is to get involved with another person's wants, needs and expectations when your own thoughts are clouded by pain, anger and disappointment.
If you give yourself time to grieve, you have a better chance of finding a solid relationship because you will be making choices from a position of strength, rather then one of sadness.
3.
Don't quit your job.
This may sound like the kind of advice that should fall in the "duh" category, but you'd be surprised at how many people use their divorce as an excuse to quit work.
Yes, it is true when you are in pain concentration is a challenge.
However, you would do well to stick it out.
Work is hard to find these days, and giving it up when you are going to be facing a new life is counter productive.
Take a couple of sick days to lick your wounds, then get back in the saddle.
Keeping busy in this way will both help you plan for later, and keep you distracted from your immediate woes.
In the end, the best thing you can do for yourself right now is to avoid making any decision that could have permanent or long term consequences.
Eventually, you will feel better, and well able to make choices for yourself based on your long term needs and interests.
However, until you've given yourself time to process the grief and pain of your divorce, it is too easy to make important decisions hastily based on the desire for anything that will ameliorate the pain.
The last thing you should want to do right now is cause yourself problems that you'll have to solve when you are ready to plan your future.