Surviving Being Single and Jobless During the Holidays
During the holidays, most of us gather to together with our relatives in celebration.
But being single and jobless during the holidays can make us feel like we don't have much to celebrate a perception that looms larger every time a relative asks us about our job search or inquires whether we're dating someone.
Of course, we've all been fed plenty of platitudes about the value of remaining thankful for what we have in the face of what we don't, but the fact remains that good finances and healthy romance are two of the greatest predictors of happiness in life, which could be why those who love us are so eager to know about our job prospects and love life.
Nevertheless, the constant questions can get annoying, especially when all we want to do is sip brandy, eat chocolates and stop thinking about our rent being behind.
So, how do we-the single and jobless-enjoy a holiday gathering amid the storm of romance and job related inquires that are bound to come? Let's start with the basics.
One of the best ways to deflect attention from yourself and onto the person that you're conversing with is to steer the conversation towards a subject that the person has expertise in.
Politics? Pet care? Religion? It really doesn't matter.
People love to display their knowledge.
Yes, you're ultimately preying on people's ego when you entice them to revel in their expertise.
But it's either that or become pressured into explaining what went wrong on your last date.
Another way to fend off nosey relatives is to engage them in the holiday spirit.
Talking about what you're thankful for instead of articulating your difficulties will encourage them to follow suit.
Revisiting funny holiday memories is great way to turn the conversation from depressing to uplifting in the blink of an eye.
If your relatives move past inquiring about your life and start suggesting that you're the cause of your problems, don't start arguing with them.
Politely acknowledge everything that they say by casually nodding your head-as if you've heard it all before-and then tell them that you'll consider their advice.
Sound impossible? Well, as Oscar Wilde said: "Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
" Keep your cool and you'll come out on top.
You'll also spare other family members from witnessing an ugly argument.
Most important of all, make sure that it's your relatives and not you who are being impolite.
Sometimes we become so focused on our problems that we mistake an innocuous comment or question for an insult.
You're relatives, especially those who haven't seen you in awhile, will want an update on your life, and the two most natural things to ask about are work and romance, if only because they define a large part of our lives.
But if your relatives get argumentative or can't take the hint that you'd rather not be put on the spot, then it's time to consider one of the strategies mentioned above.
But being single and jobless during the holidays can make us feel like we don't have much to celebrate a perception that looms larger every time a relative asks us about our job search or inquires whether we're dating someone.
Of course, we've all been fed plenty of platitudes about the value of remaining thankful for what we have in the face of what we don't, but the fact remains that good finances and healthy romance are two of the greatest predictors of happiness in life, which could be why those who love us are so eager to know about our job prospects and love life.
Nevertheless, the constant questions can get annoying, especially when all we want to do is sip brandy, eat chocolates and stop thinking about our rent being behind.
So, how do we-the single and jobless-enjoy a holiday gathering amid the storm of romance and job related inquires that are bound to come? Let's start with the basics.
One of the best ways to deflect attention from yourself and onto the person that you're conversing with is to steer the conversation towards a subject that the person has expertise in.
Politics? Pet care? Religion? It really doesn't matter.
People love to display their knowledge.
Yes, you're ultimately preying on people's ego when you entice them to revel in their expertise.
But it's either that or become pressured into explaining what went wrong on your last date.
Another way to fend off nosey relatives is to engage them in the holiday spirit.
Talking about what you're thankful for instead of articulating your difficulties will encourage them to follow suit.
Revisiting funny holiday memories is great way to turn the conversation from depressing to uplifting in the blink of an eye.
If your relatives move past inquiring about your life and start suggesting that you're the cause of your problems, don't start arguing with them.
Politely acknowledge everything that they say by casually nodding your head-as if you've heard it all before-and then tell them that you'll consider their advice.
Sound impossible? Well, as Oscar Wilde said: "Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
" Keep your cool and you'll come out on top.
You'll also spare other family members from witnessing an ugly argument.
Most important of all, make sure that it's your relatives and not you who are being impolite.
Sometimes we become so focused on our problems that we mistake an innocuous comment or question for an insult.
You're relatives, especially those who haven't seen you in awhile, will want an update on your life, and the two most natural things to ask about are work and romance, if only because they define a large part of our lives.
But if your relatives get argumentative or can't take the hint that you'd rather not be put on the spot, then it's time to consider one of the strategies mentioned above.
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