It is painful when your husband had an affair and is likely to be the father of the paramour's baby. If you still have love for your husband despite these events, it does not have to mean the end of your marriage. You can survive this and have a good marriage. We will talk about some things in general that you can do to achieve this.

Is Your Husband Really The Father?
There have been countless cases where a woman that was involved with a guy, knowingly and wrongfully say that someone's husband is the father of the child. She may be unable to find the true daddy of her child, so she would try to convince your husband that he is the true father.

Find out once and for all if your husband is the father of this child through a paternity test. Brace your self for whatever outcome. If the father of the kid in question is not your husband, that's one less thing for you to worry about. If the test says that he is the father, it's more disturbing news to hear, but hang in there. Either way, it is time to move on.

For the utmost improvement in your marriage, there needs to be healthy communication between you and your husband. This includes planning ahead for the time the paramour gives birth to the baby in the event that your husband is the father.

Since your husband had an affair and a child is coming as a result of it, there will be changes to accommodate the child. Since you are the victim you will want whatever changes to be in your favour. Your husband may play a significant role in this child's life. So there will be periods where communication takes place between your husband and the ex-paramour to discuss the happenings of the child.

It will be easier if you are around when communication takes place. Any topic other than that of the development of the child should not be tolerated. Listen to calls over the phone, and monitor any other forms of communication used, such as text messaging. If custody is shared and it's your husband's turn to keep the child, bring a relative or a trusted friend along to get the child and bring him/her to your husband if you can. The last thing you want is for your husband and the ex-paramour to be alone.

It goes without saying that honesty and transparency need to be present in your marriage from now and forever more. No bending of the truth, and no more lies. No one wants to spend the rest of their life with someone who is a perpetual liar. You both need to listen to each other and as a couple, find common ground on the pathway forward, so your marriage will start healing.

After all, your husband would not like it if the tables were turned, and you were pregnant with a child that is not his. He broke the wedding vows with the atrocious affair he had, and must take full responsibility for it.

The toxic feelings, emotions, thoughts and visions felt when your husband had an affair, can be enough to drive you crazy. It will be difficult, but you if you are going to do your part in improving this marriage, it helps to get these feelings under control, and then you can get to the root cause of the issues.

Even though your husband had an affair and is now the father of the paramour's child, your marriage can still get over it. There must be good communication, a higher level of transparency in your marriage, spouses must be honest, and those traits must be displayed at all times.

My Husband Had An Affair What Should I Do Now?
You may want to check this detailed step-by-step guide to healing yourself first before doing anything else.
http://surviveemotionalphysicalaffairs.blogspot.com/2011/12/my-husband-had-affair-now-what-should-i.html