The first thing to realize is, there is no checklist of things that can be done to magically save a bad marriage or instantly repair a relationship if they are executed like a checklist.
This is especially true when issues such as marriage and money come into play.
Suggestions like these have to be more than things that are just 'executed'.
Every gesture you make has to be with heart and feeling, or your spouse will just see right through it.
That being said, bare in mind these are just guidelines for creating positive gestures that can help improve the overall atmosphere in your home; even better than most marriage retreats.
Improving that setting will lay the foundation for you being able to save a bad marriage.
These tips will work weather you have been together 5 months, 5 years, or 25 years.
When you look at this list, try not to just focus on the action itself, but try to focus on the INTENT of the action.
That is the most important thing.
So here they are, and I have listed my personal favorites that were a great initial step in the right direction towards healing my marriage: * Every day, kiss your spouse before you leave in the morning, when you see each in the evening after work, and just before you go to sleep at night.
* Hug your spouse at least twice a day.
-> Remember, think of the intent - to promote intimacy, not just hugging to hug * Re-affirm your partner for something they did.
-> Example - "Remember when you hand-wrote me that card, I don't know if I really told you how sweet that was...
Thank you.
" * Set aside some time each day (at least 10 minutes) of distraction free time with your spouse.
(i.
e.
- no television, no phone, no kids, no internet, etc.
) * Encourage your spouse to take some alone time, just for them.
(Love this one - works especially well if you have young children) * Be nice.
-> I know it seems self explanatory, but think about it...
If you were like me, there had been several months of resentment and anger building up, with hardly any communicating.
It can certainly lead to treating your spouse with less kindness than you would even treat a stranger, and certainly less than a friend.
* Make a HUGE deal about your spouses' birthday.
-> Remember the intent here.
It is not about throwing a party, its about letting them you care about them enough to make their day extra special.
It can also be an intimate get together that you put real effort into planning.
However, the surprise party does work great to help fix a bad relationship.
It promotes the notion that you are rebuilding your image as a happy couple to friends and family.
If you can imagine it again, you can make it happen if both of you are willing.
* Take a night once a week to plan a meal together, watch a favorite movie, or go out to dinner.
* Plan together how you want to spend the next upcoming holiday - weather it's several activities, or just relaxing at home.
Talk about it.
* Each year, celebrate your anniversary and take the opportunity to reaffirm your love and commitment to each other.
- A commitment ceremony works great for this.
* Don't expect your spouse to be a mind reader, and don't try to be a mind reader yourself.