The words are as confusing as they are unwanted: "I think we need a break from each other".
How long of a break does she want you to take? Have you just been dumped? Is your relationship over, or is there a chance you can bring it back to life? These are the questions you'll probably ask as soon as your girlfriend announces that you need to take some time apart.
Her answers don't matter so much - it's what you do afterward that will determine whether you'll go your separate ways or get back together with your now ex-girlfriend.
Your girlfriend asking for a "break" is a pretty big cop-out, and you need to treat it as such.
While you might think treating her with kid gloves is the right way to coax her back into the relationship, the truth is you need to shock her into reversing the decision by taking a hardcore stance against it.
A "break" isn't what you want - you're looking to continue dating your girlfriend and building a future with her.
If she's asking for time apart, she may have ulterior motives...
and you need to find out what these are.
The first course of action: don't resist the fact that she wants to be alone.
Give her all the time and space she needs, and in fact, agree with her when she asks for time away.
Tell her that yes, the two of you could definitely use some time apart.
No tearful goodbyes, no big hugging or kissing session - give her a quick wave and walk away.
Right off the bat this will jar her out of the comfortable little world she thought she was putting herself into.
What world? The world where she gets to try new things and possibly date new people while you sit around dutifully waiting for your girlfriend to come back to you.
You need to step all over that idea, and quickly too.
Getting your ex back requires that you immediately give her exactly what she wants: total and complete freedom.
This means you should break all possible contact with your ex in order to make her as uncomfortable about the "break" as possible.
No phone calls, no emails, no text-messaging...
nothing should exist between you.
The only call you should accept is the one where your exgirlfriend apologizes for asking to be apart from you and wants to date you again.
Up until that point? Any contact the two of you have will only strengthen her decision to continue staying away.
Taking a break from your relationship isn't the retrospective exercise in self-examination she's making it out to be.
Either your ex is unhappy with certain aspects of your relationship, or she's considering another guy.
You'll find out pretty quickly which one of these things it is, but there are ways to work on both of them.
Getting your ex back from another guy is entirely possible, but you're probably not going to keep them from getting together in the first place.
No amount of threats, ultimatums, or deadlines is going to work in this case.
In fact, the more you resist the break up the further you'll push her away.
But if your ex really did ask for a separation because she's unhappy, consider the relationship honestly.
Think about the beginning, when you first started dating.
Try to remember how you acted back then, and how you both treated each other.
If the end of the relationship looks a lot different than that time, one or both of you might need to make some adjustments.
Respect and love: those are the keys to staying together.
If you can somehow recapture those things, you'll make your ex want you back again.
And this will be made even easier if she misses you...
which she will, if you've followed the no contact ex-girlfriend rules outlined above.
And if your break does become more than just a temporary separation? Don't panic.
There are lots of things you can do to repair your relationship.
Some of them are even easier to accomplish once you've totally broken up, because they allow you to build on a strong new foundation - not an old, crumbled one.