In the 2003 movie, "Under the Tuscan Sun," Diane Lane's character, Frances, is going through a divorce. Frances does a fantastic job summing up the agony of divorce when she says, "Do you know the most surprising thing about divorce? It doesn't actually kill you... It should." No matter which side of the coin you're on - the person initiating the divorce or the person who didn't - it's never easy. There are two major aspects to divorce: the emotional component and the legal component. Legal matters can be confusing during the best of times but trying to sort out who gets what in a divorce is exponentially complicated with emotions running high. If there are kids involved, things become even more tangled and fraught with concerns over custody and child support. The whole mess is enough to overwhelm even the calmest, most level-headed soul. It's natural to feel hurt, angry, betrayed and just about anything else including maybe even relieved. No matter what the situation, there are things you can do to help make sense of it all. Take a deep breath, grab a cup of tea, and read on to discover how to survive your divorce one step at a time.

* Lawyer up. No matter how amicable things are between you and your soon-to-be ex, you still need legal representation. Websites such as mypafamilylawyer.com can help you find the right lawyer for you. Getting a lawyer is an extremely important step in protecting yourself and your assets.

* Don't go it alone. Divorce can and often does feel like a physical blow. The hard truth is it can take months or even years to recover. This is not something you should try to do on your own. Lean on your support system, whether that's friends, family, coworkers or whoever. Let them be there for you and help you through.

* Take care of yourself. There can be a real temptation to simply not get out of bed in the morning. That's completely understandable. However, if you're going to get through you have to start by taking care of yourself. Get out of bed and exercise a little, even if it's just a walk around the block. Start doing things that make you happy like taking up an activity or interest you let slip away during the marriage. Spend an hour at your local bookstore or book a treatment at a spa. Whatever it is that makes you feel good, do it.

* Leave the kids out of it. If you have kids, it can be extremely difficult to avoid involving them in the divorce. However, it's critical for your children's wellbeing that you minimize the impact the divorce has on them. Do not trash talk or fight with your ex in front them. Be civil to one another even if you think your head is going to explode. You can always talk to a friend or counselor later to get it all out. Remember that your kids love you both and their hearts are breaking, too.

* Let it go. Like the song says, let it go. This is probably the hardest part and won't happen overnight. The feelings you're having now are intense but they will start to ebb and fade - if you let them. It's all too easy to hang on to negative emotions but at some point you have to be willing to let go of them in order to move on.

Everyone deals with divorce in their own way but following these tips will help you get a jump start on the process.