There's nothing like cuddling a toddler to cheer a grandparent up.
They are so trusting and these moments are precious.
There is more to being a good grandparent than those wonderful cuddles, though.
Avoiding Taking Over: This is my biggest fear as a grandparent.
I'm not the mother or father.
What the parents say goes.
It's so easy to slip back into "mommy mode," and it is such a bad idea.
Curbing this impulse is stressful but what is more stressful is wondering if we've slipped up somewhere.
Spoiling: Color me guilty.
I am limited by my checking account but if I see something I want to get it.
If it's an extra snack or a not-so-healthy treat I am right there.
That's not good and like the mommy mode it needs curbed.
I'm rather thankful that the checking account limits how much I can do.
Discipline: If the child does something wrong, who should point it out and decide if there is to be some form of discipline? Does it change if the grandparent is babysitting? What's acceptable and what isn't? This is an area that requires a heart to heart with the parent(s).
Going back to taking over it's not my prerogative to make absolute decisions.
Some things are obvious.
If something is thrown, the child must pick it up.
Some aren't.
How should we handle a screaming temper fit? Illness: Having raised two children you'd think I'd be able to handle a sick toddler.
Nope.
Melted Heart Syndrome.
Housework? Nope, cuddle time.
You want to watch Sleeping Beauty three times in a row? Sure.
I'd rather be the one sick than watch our granddaughter when she's ill.
A lot of this stress can be tamed by discussing issues with the child's parents as they come up.
A few, like discipline, can be discussed beforehand.
Most of the decisions made by our daughter are excellent choices.
They may not be what I would have done, but they work.
That's what is most important.