I'm your husband, your boyfriend, your fiancee.
I'm also an addict, and this is what addicts do.
No matter how hard you try, you cannot nor will not change me.
Any control you may think you have over my actions or behavior is just an illusion.
You cannot make me treat you any better, let alone with any respect.
All I care about, all I think about, are my needs and how I can go about fulfilling them.
You are only a tool; something I can and will use to make sure my needs are met.
Of course I'll say I love you.
But when I say I love you, know that I am lying, because love is impossible for someone in active addiction.
I wouldn't be using drugs if I loved myself, but I am using drugs; I cannot possibly love you.
Yes- I have feelings.
 And though I can handle the highest levels of physical pain, the smallest dose of emotional discomfort will bring me to my knees.
So I push them down, cover them up and numb them out with the Drug of the Day.
So unattached am I from my true self, from my own feelings that I'm only a few test answers away from being labeled Sociopathic.
That will not, however, stop me from trying to borrow money, your car, a credit card...
using every guilt trip I know, before the conversation ends.
I have to.
It's what addicts do.
I feel no empathy for you, for I have no empathy.
If only I could feel, it would hurt me that I hurt you; that I leave you and the kids without food, that I lie, cheat and steal.
But I cannot feel, and I will not feel until my behavior changes, until I make a decision to stop using/drinking-following up that decision with a plan of action.
And until I make that decision, until I take that action, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Please, stop being surprised.
I am an addict.
And that's what addicts do.