The Wrong Time to Begin Dating
There is a wrong time to enter the dating game.
You may have been told that you need to get out there and play the field or that you need to find that special someone, but the fact of the matter is there is a wrong time to begin the dating game.
Let us explore some of the things that may be going on in your life that may signal you need to wait.
Foremost, the wrong time is any time when you are sad, feeling lonely or feeling sorry for yourself.
This may sound backwards, but if you enter the dating game with any of these types of feelings then your neediness can could your decisions.
Furthermore, if you do find someone, then the neediness of finding that person could create a dependency on that person.
When you are needy your feelings are confused by all the pain you may be going through.
This is going to cloud your judgment about the things that you may want.
And, yes, that could even mean choosing someone that really does not interest you just to fill a void of loneliness or neediness.
You are basically asking someone else, rather than yourself, to make you feel better.
The clouded judgment means you cannot clearly see what the other person has to offer to you, and dating them could leave you in a worse situation than you were in before.
This relationship is doomed from the start, and rather than being better off, you will probably be in worse condition because you never faced what was going on before this recent relationship ended.
Here are a few times when it is not a good idea to begin dating someone or seek a relationship" 1.
The death of someone or something close to you.
You need time to cope with the grief of the loss and no person can fill that void for you.
While a person you may meet under these circumstances could turn out to be wonderful, if you rely on them for that purpose you are messing up what could be a good thing.
Furthermore, it is going to slow down you healing from the grief.
2.
You are depressed.
If you suffer from long term sadness, loss of concentration, can't sleep, etc, then no person is going to be able to fix that.
You need to consider speaking with a professional about this problem rather then relying on someone to repair that.
3.
You have just broken up with someone.
This is a time when you are feeling very lonely and vulnerable and you may really lower your standards just to be with someone.
Furthermore, you are probably not really interested in someone else at the time, and how fair is that to someone else that you may be trying to date? When you decide that you want to begin dating, take a look at all the "baggage" in your life and see if there is anything that you need to address.
Assess if you are just looking for someone to fill some void.
If so, you need to step back and really think about things before moving forward.
That is for your sake and for the sake of the other person.
You may have been told that you need to get out there and play the field or that you need to find that special someone, but the fact of the matter is there is a wrong time to begin the dating game.
Let us explore some of the things that may be going on in your life that may signal you need to wait.
Foremost, the wrong time is any time when you are sad, feeling lonely or feeling sorry for yourself.
This may sound backwards, but if you enter the dating game with any of these types of feelings then your neediness can could your decisions.
Furthermore, if you do find someone, then the neediness of finding that person could create a dependency on that person.
When you are needy your feelings are confused by all the pain you may be going through.
This is going to cloud your judgment about the things that you may want.
And, yes, that could even mean choosing someone that really does not interest you just to fill a void of loneliness or neediness.
You are basically asking someone else, rather than yourself, to make you feel better.
The clouded judgment means you cannot clearly see what the other person has to offer to you, and dating them could leave you in a worse situation than you were in before.
This relationship is doomed from the start, and rather than being better off, you will probably be in worse condition because you never faced what was going on before this recent relationship ended.
Here are a few times when it is not a good idea to begin dating someone or seek a relationship" 1.
The death of someone or something close to you.
You need time to cope with the grief of the loss and no person can fill that void for you.
While a person you may meet under these circumstances could turn out to be wonderful, if you rely on them for that purpose you are messing up what could be a good thing.
Furthermore, it is going to slow down you healing from the grief.
2.
You are depressed.
If you suffer from long term sadness, loss of concentration, can't sleep, etc, then no person is going to be able to fix that.
You need to consider speaking with a professional about this problem rather then relying on someone to repair that.
3.
You have just broken up with someone.
This is a time when you are feeling very lonely and vulnerable and you may really lower your standards just to be with someone.
Furthermore, you are probably not really interested in someone else at the time, and how fair is that to someone else that you may be trying to date? When you decide that you want to begin dating, take a look at all the "baggage" in your life and see if there is anything that you need to address.
Assess if you are just looking for someone to fill some void.
If so, you need to step back and really think about things before moving forward.
That is for your sake and for the sake of the other person.
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