How I Live With General Anxiety Disorder
General Anxiety Disorder, often referred to as "GAD", is a very real anxiety disorder that can be very debilitating for many people.
I personally was diagnosed with GAD in November of 2007, after a mental breakdown that was triggered by extreme stress.
I remember attempting to go to work one day and not being able to walk through the door, I was paralyzed with the fear of doing my job.
I stood on the sidewalk outside that office door for 20 minutes, my body shaking - and in tears, rationalizing to myself why I could not go in.
I turned around, ran to my car and left.
As far back in my childhood as I can recall, my parents would tell me that I could "make a mountain out of a mole hill".
I never quite knew what they meant by that remark until I was diagnosed with GAD.
I do remember worrying myself sick with thoughts about horrible things that "could" possibly happen to other people in my life.
Even though everyone in my life was happy and healthy, the worry of something happening would consume me.
Some nights racing thoughts would keeping me awake for hours just repeating until I was so fatigued I would simply pass out from sheer exhaustion.
Now, after being properly diagnosed and learning to recognize and deal with my symptoms, I am on a mild medication to help manage my GAD.
With the help of my doctor and medication, I function as near to normal as is possible.
However; several things that I have to do to keep myself in balance are:
However; as with any schedule, there can be deviations with or without warning.
On the days that I am unable to stick to my written out schedule, I have learned to just take things one moment at a time.
I don't allow the growing anxiety inside to cause me to panic, and I just let life flow.
I deal with life as it comes along the best that I can on those days.
Don't get me wrong, there are days that go horribly wrong.
On horrible days, that is when I usually find myself reading over my daily journal to compare other bad days to see what I did to cope then.
When I am referring back to other bad days and what I did to get through them, it allows me to recognize behavior patterns and correct them.
I believe that recognizing a behavior and changing it helps work through the anxiety best for me.
I am lucky that I also have a very supportive family who understands me and what I deal with daily.
I am also privileged to have wonderful friends to help me along the way.
In moments where I do lose control, there is usually someone there to point it out to me.
When I know it is happening, then I am able to understand what is going on and I pull myself back into place.
Dealing with GAD on a daily basis is sometimes very hard.
But as long as I do what I can to help myself, and use the tools that I have at my disposal, I usually succeed at having one great day after another.
I personally was diagnosed with GAD in November of 2007, after a mental breakdown that was triggered by extreme stress.
I remember attempting to go to work one day and not being able to walk through the door, I was paralyzed with the fear of doing my job.
I stood on the sidewalk outside that office door for 20 minutes, my body shaking - and in tears, rationalizing to myself why I could not go in.
I turned around, ran to my car and left.
As far back in my childhood as I can recall, my parents would tell me that I could "make a mountain out of a mole hill".
I never quite knew what they meant by that remark until I was diagnosed with GAD.
I do remember worrying myself sick with thoughts about horrible things that "could" possibly happen to other people in my life.
Even though everyone in my life was happy and healthy, the worry of something happening would consume me.
Some nights racing thoughts would keeping me awake for hours just repeating until I was so fatigued I would simply pass out from sheer exhaustion.
Now, after being properly diagnosed and learning to recognize and deal with my symptoms, I am on a mild medication to help manage my GAD.
With the help of my doctor and medication, I function as near to normal as is possible.
However; several things that I have to do to keep myself in balance are:
- Get the proper amount of sleep each night - if I deviate from this, My behavior becomes irrational.
- Stick as closely to a strict written out schedule as I possibly can - I have to plan my day in advance and stick to it as closely as possible.
- Exercise daily, even if it is only a walk to clear my head - I walk a lot, even if it's only around the block.
- Eat nutritionally, and be honest with myself about it - we all like to think we eat nutritionally, but you MUST be honest with yourself about it because it is only you that is being fooled when you lie about it.
- Avoid smoking and beverages with caffeine completely - I do not smoke, that is my personal decision, but I do get caught off guard at odd times having a soda or cup of coffee.
When I do, I always notice it in the reaction in my body, it causes anxiety.
So I usually stick to lemon lime flavored soda's. - Take my medication as prescribed - without fail, no excuses.
- Keep a daily journal - this is also handy when you try to recall things that you felt at different times during the day.
It has helped me to identify more than just my anxious feelings.
This is a very useful tool for everyone to use.
However; as with any schedule, there can be deviations with or without warning.
On the days that I am unable to stick to my written out schedule, I have learned to just take things one moment at a time.
I don't allow the growing anxiety inside to cause me to panic, and I just let life flow.
I deal with life as it comes along the best that I can on those days.
Don't get me wrong, there are days that go horribly wrong.
On horrible days, that is when I usually find myself reading over my daily journal to compare other bad days to see what I did to cope then.
When I am referring back to other bad days and what I did to get through them, it allows me to recognize behavior patterns and correct them.
I believe that recognizing a behavior and changing it helps work through the anxiety best for me.
I am lucky that I also have a very supportive family who understands me and what I deal with daily.
I am also privileged to have wonderful friends to help me along the way.
In moments where I do lose control, there is usually someone there to point it out to me.
When I know it is happening, then I am able to understand what is going on and I pull myself back into place.
Dealing with GAD on a daily basis is sometimes very hard.
But as long as I do what I can to help myself, and use the tools that I have at my disposal, I usually succeed at having one great day after another.
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